Gruden says he can't take much more of this Gary Shelton, The St.Petersburg Times, published 3 January 2005 He is a man lost in the desert, and, frankly, Jon Gruden seems a little ticked about the circumstances that have led him here. Gruden stands at the low point of his career, tucked away in a cramped nook in the bowels of Sun Devil Stadium. This is where the fall from the mountaintop has left him, attempting to explain away 11 losses in a season, 20 losses in two. This is the latest stop on a descent into misery. It is moments after the latest failure, a loss to the wretched Arizona Cardinals in an insignificant game unworthy of witnesses. For most of the afternoon, the Cardinals seemed like a franchise trying to avoid success at all costs, only to end up beating the Bucs in spite of themselves. Now, Gruden leans against the wall in a cold, brick corridor and talks of the unraveling of a franchise. At times, his voice is soft as he searches through the frustration to find the right words. Then, the anger flashes, and the words come out hard and blunt. He is angry. He is frustrated. It is odd, because he is so demonstrative on the field with his facial contortions and his body language, people often expect him to be the same in the interview room. There, however, Gruden dances around what he really feels with a poker face and a quick line. Not this time. This time, you could see the fire behind Gruden's eyes. This time, you could hear the bullets in his voice. Three times in his postgame interviews, Gruden spoke of circumstances in which he no longer would be the coach of the Bucs. Each time, he was talking about a particular problem that had worn thin. Talking about his team's continued mistakes, Gruden said: "If we can't play any better than this, they need to get a new coach." Asked about Chris Simms' continued problems in handling a center snap, Gruden said: "If it's a problem with Simms, it is a real problem with me. I have never been associated with that, and I won't be, whether they run me out of here or not." Asked about the Bucs' continued inability to run the ball, Gruden said: "It's very frustrating. I don't want to be associated with a team that can't run the ball any better than this. None of us do." Of course, Gruden is the coach of the Bucs, and as such, blame for any of the shortcomings can be placed upon his desk. Yes, Gruden said. The records are on him. When a coach keeps mentioning no longer being in his job, however, it is possible to wonder if wanderlust has arrived. No, Gruden said. There is nothing to his messages other than stressing to his team how much he means what he is saying. "Look, I plan on being here until I'm dead," Gruden said. "Or until one of those big yellow excavators comes and takes me away. I just want this team to know that we've got to be able to handle a snap, we've got to hang onto a football. That's all." For Gruden, the current situation is the largest challenge of his career. A Super Bowl champion less than two years ago, his team has regressed back to the days of Sam Wyche and 5-dash-11. It is a sloppy, mistake-prone team in need of major repair, and from the outside, it may have more problems than Gruden has time - and salary-cap room - to fix. Consider this: The Bucs will pick fifth in the upcoming draft. Assuming there are available athletes of equal grade at every position, where should he draft first? Running back? Offensive tackle? Receiver? Guard? Safety? Tight end? Defensive tackle? How you answered doesn't matter. Merely the need at so many positions suggests the magnitude of the problem. "I understand the challenge," Gruden said. "I understood it in my first year, and I certainly understand it now. At the same time, I have a lot of confidence in this program." Still, Gruden admits, he is frustrated by the constant mistakes. "I lead the league in frustration," Gruden said. "We've lost 20 times in two years. To me, they all feel the same. They're disgusting. I take full responsibility for them. I feel like I've let a lot of people down - players, coaches, fans, family members." Often, Gruden invites some of his critics. He talks too often about injuries, too loudly about bad bounces, too easily about athletes who are no longer in this team's colors. There are times he is Lemony Snicket, and the losing is explained away as a series of unfortunate events. There are times it would be nice to see Gruden with less tolerance for Michael Pittman's fumbles, for his offensive line's inability to stay onside. There are times it would be nice to glimpse inside Gruden and see the flames. "I try not to externalize," he said. "But I struggle with it. I struggle. I don't bet a quinella. I don't bet on a horse to show. I'm not interested in showing, I'm interested in going. I'm interested in winning, okay? We had some show horses this year. We had some good pieces, some good things happen. But that final hundred yards or so, you've got to get across the finish line and win the race." At the funeral of a season, long after the death of possibilities, here is a question to take into the offseason. How many victories do you think the Bucs will have next year? Seven? Eight? For Gruden, that may not be enough. He is not the only person employed by the Bucs who is frustrated. He has no monopoly on impatience. Another year of this, and it will not only be Gruden's voice talking about someone else as coach of the Bucs.